Unapologetically Apostolic

2 Samuel 6:14-22 And David danced before the Lord with all his might; and David was girded with a linen ephod.15 So David and all the house of Israel brought up the ark of the Lord with shouting, and with the sound of the trumpet.16 And as the ark of the Lord came into the city of David, Michal Saul's daughter looked through a window, and saw king David leaping and dancing before the Lord; and she despised him in her heart. 17 And they brought in the ark of the Lord, and set it in his place, in the midst of the tabernacle that David had pitched for it: and David offered burnt offerings and peace offerings before the Lord.18 And as soon as David had made an end of offering burnt offerings and peace offerings, he blessed the people in the name of the Lord of hosts.19 And he dealt among all the people, even among the whole multitude of Israel, as well to the women as men, to every one a cake of bread, and a good piece of flesh, and a flagon of wine. So all the people departed every on...

I want to say that I love the Lord. I'm grateful for the precious gift of the Holy Ghost. All of my life, I have had a longing within me for something that was greater than myself. I would throw myself into things desiring to be the very best that I could so that I didn't feel like a failure. Anything less than perfection was not an option, especially for my dad. When I started faithfully attending church as a teenager, I wasn't surprised when it began to be used as a form of punishment when I failed at something. Church meant something to me, therefore if I failed I would not be allowed to go until that failure was rectified. Then, attendance became a means of manipulation and control. Yet I still desired to go.  There was something within me crying out for more. Week in and week out as I sat on that pew listening as the preacher shared the Word, inevitably to find myself for the 30th, 50th or 100th time quietly making my way to an alter because I felt drawn to something d...

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again expecting a different outcome. But is it insanity if you do the same thing because you know no other way? For as far back as I can remember, people that were in a position of spiritual authority for me would constantly ask me the same question, "How many times are you going to go around this same mountain?"  It was a question that I could not answer. I was in a spiritual wilderness, wandering and waiting, hoping that one day I would make it to the promised land. The issue with what was occuring for me was a bit two-fold. One: I was raised in a church that told me that if I was saved I was ok. And two: how was what I was doing different from what others around me in the church was doing? Why did I feel guilty for it and "unsaved" and they are in a position of leadership? Even as a teenager, I constantly stayed in an alter begging God to cleanse me and "rededicating" my life to Him. Then reac...

For years, I have listened to a song that I learned while in a previous church. I have loved the song and the meaning that I felt was behind it.  The song was titled Holy Visitation written and sang by Rita Springer. I'm sure many in the non-denominational as well as AG and COG have heard this song and worshipped to it. The premise of the song is the Spirit of God coming back to the people with a holy visitation.  But do we need just a visitation?  1 Corinthians 6:19 says, "What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?"  1 Corinthians 3:16 says "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?" This tells you that there is a need for more than just a need for a visit. Think of it in the sense of a child. If a parent has custody of a child, that child lives in the home of the parent. They dwell within the home and have access to everything insi...

Several years ago, I began a journey of writing about my life. I always went back to my birth and the shocked and awed doctor making an exclamatory remark that has dictated much of my life. When one's expectation did not meet reality in that moment, the statement became my identity. To hear the phrase, "Oh my God! There's another one!" exclaimed over and over as a mantra leads to a break in the psyche of that individual.  You develop a mindset that says you should not have been, you were not wanted, the after-thought that will never be anything in life. For years I struggled and when I started the writing project, I felt as if I had found a voice. But the focus of that writing changed or shifted from that part of my life to everything else that had happened in my life. I shifted from how that statement had influenced me for my life to glorifying the things I did wrong because of it.  I felt hidden and unseen.  But my pastor made a statement during the service last nig...

In March of 2021, I was in a very dark place in my life. I was depressed and suicidal, just making it through the day to come home to sleep and repeat my misery. I was in a volunteer organization that I felt was my family, but really I was just an outsider trying my best to fit a mold of what someone else wanted for me. The only good that came from this involvement was meeting the gentleman that is now my pastor. He helped me through many of those dark days back then and introduced me to the way of Truth. He invited me to church and told me to come as I was. I took him at his word and showed up on my pants and station polo shirt. That first service was March 10,  I believe, and I've missed very few since, only for work and an illness.  I followed the Acts 2:38 message of repentance to the best of my understanding at the time, baptism in Jesus name and the reception of the Holy Ghost. I'm learning though that repentance is more than just saying I'm sorry and going on about m...

Pastor made a point today during worship that I haven't been able to shake. We were singing "Goodness of God" when he brought the singing to a halt while the music continued.  The chorus says "All my life You have been faithful. All my life You have been so, so good." It was the next part though, that my mind keeps replaying. "With every breath that I am able, I will sing of the goodness of God." He made the point of saying that the breath that we take in is a gift, the life flowing into our body moment by moment. So it is our duty to praise Him as we exhale for the gift which was just given. As I stood there with tears streaming down my face, I was reminded of the creation of man in scripture. He formed man from the dust of the ground. Then He caused sleep to come on man and formed woman. How did they get life? He formed them, yes, but what caused them to live? He breathed into them to give them His breath.  In Ezekiel 37, we find the account of the v...