It was too wet

These past few weeks, I have been reflecting greatly on my life and the walk that I have with Christ. I said it the other day that I came into church with a head full of knowledge. I could quote scripture and blazed through Bible drills in a flash. But what does all of that accomplish? Not much.

In a walk of faith, just as in building a building, it starts with the foundation. After spending my formative years in a traditional church followed by the middle years in non-denominational churches, I am finding that my foundation wasn't so firm.  But why? While the knowledge was there and I was speed (a la Lighning McQueen in Cars), there was nothing depth. Anytime things are done quickly, there are usually corners cut somewhere. For me, it has been trying to build a strong building upon that old foundation.

In construction, concrete work is key to the soundness of the structure. If concrete is too wet, it results in a weaker final product with increased porosity, shrinkage, and a higher chance of cracking. Excess water can also lead to surface defects like dusting and cracking from trapped moisture, and cause issues with floor coatings and adhesives.

 

1.Structural weakness=Reduced strength: The water-to-cement ratio is critical; too much water creates more space between cement particles, resulting in a weaker concrete structure. Speaking in a spiritual aspect, this leaves gaps in your foundation where flaws can develop. You have victory over certain things but you do not put them fully under submission to God and the cleansing of His word. 

2.Increased porosity: Excess water can make the concrete more porous, especially on the surface. It is in these areas where the old things begin to slip back in, being absorbed into the foundation. Old ideologies and theologies that should have been replaced with Truth and understanding begin to mix together and lines become blurred. 

3.Greater shrinkage: Too-wet concrete will shrink more as it dries, leading to an increased risk of cracking. It is this shrinkage that causes one to pull away and do all that can be done to just stand. 

It is usually when you reach this third zone where renovations begin to take place to repair the cracks which have developed and are greatly visible. Engineers and architects are developing plans to stabilize a foundation that is seemingly crumbling out from under itself and rightfully so. It is in fact crumbling out from under itself and no amount of effort or repair can stop the inevitable from occurring. 

But, I know the great Architect that specializes in repairing even the most broken of foundations. We read in Matthew 7 about the importance of a good foundation, starting in vs 24: "Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock. And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it."

For 4 1/2 years now, I have tried to build upon what I thought was a good foundation. It was the Word that I grew up knowing after all.  But I am learning that when the pressure came in this season, my foundation wasn't founded not upon sand per se, but upon a foundation built upon watered down theology. I thought I could build a sound structure and have it last without having to relay a groundwork. I didn't want to take the time and effort necessary to ensure that the foundation was solid. I built upon that groundwork which was laid with a watered down, feel good gospel. I had the structural weakness resulting in reduced strength to withstand the things which came at me. I had the porosity that allowed for inconsistencies and flaws to easily be absorbed. Because of this, I began to shrink and draw back until the cracks in my foundation became visible and that which I had built began to crumble all around.

But I find in Isaiah 58:8-14 where it says "Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the Lord shall be thy reward. Then shalt thou call, and the Lord shall answer; thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am. If thou take away from the midst of thee the yoke, the putting forth of the finger, and speaking vanity; And if thou draw out thy soul to the hungry, and satisfy the afflicted soul; then shall thy light rise in obscurity, and thy darkness be as the noon day: And the Lord shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not. And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in. If thou turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy of the Lord, honourable; and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: Then shalt thou delight thyself in the Lord; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it."

I have a ways to go to redig the footers and make sure the foundation is strong and secure. But I have a pastor, assistant pastor and other ministers that are laying a strong foundation of Truth instead of a watered-down, tickle your ears to make you feel good message. I have sisters who will hold me accountable, lifting me up with gentle reproach and correction instead of condemning me for failure or telling me I am possessed. The breech is being restored and the foundation of many generations will be lain from this point.